Let’s face it, being an adolescent can be very stressful. You may have your schedule packed with school, sports, job, and still have to find time to hang out with your friends. Many adolescents have the additional stress of not liking the way their body looks. They may feel too fat or too skinny. So on top of all the other things that they have going on in their lives they are also trying to change the way that their body looks.
Is it an eating disorder?
Eating disorders are much more common in girls, but may occur in boys as well.
There are two major types of eating disorders, Anorexia Nervosa (Anorexia) and Bulimia Nervosa (Bulimia).
In Anorexia, the adolescent eats very little and loses weight. In this type, he/she may also resort to exercising, vomiting, or taking laxatives, diet pills or water pills in order to lose more weight.
Bulimia is different; the adolescent may be eating normal or a little less, but at times he/she will lose control and eat a lot of food at once. This is called binge. He/she will then exercise, vomit, or take laxatives, diet pills or water pills to make sure that their weight does not increase; this is called purging.
But keep in mind that not everyone who is trying to lose weight has an eating disorder. Some young people want to have a healthier lifestyle, so they will replace junk foods by healthier choices and start to exercise. Their body size and shape may change, but it’s done gradually and in small steps.
If your friend is taking drastic measures to lose weight or is binging and purging it can be very unhealthy, especially if these measures are lasting weeks or even months. Here are some signs to look for in your friend to see if they may have an eating disorder. If your friend:
- Is obsessed with food, (she or he counts every calories that they eat)
- Avoids foods that he or she used to love
- Exercises too much while they are thin and losing weight
- Becomes less sociable and more competitive in school, sports, and other activities
- Doesn't feel like she or he is good enough, at anything
- Never lets you see what she or he is eating
- Continues to lose weight even when she or he is thin
- Wear large clothes while he or she is very thin
- Uses diet pills, laxatives, or water pills
- Throws-up after eating
- Smokes a lot (only in order to lose weight)
- Has fainting spells
- Has not started her period yet, while most girls her age have; or if she had started her period and had stopped for no known reason.
Eating disorders are not just about physical appearance. They are more related to emotional problems and sometimes to family problems. The way a young person deals with these problems is by controlling their eating behaviour. You may think that it is the media’s fault, because there is a lot of emphasis on looking thin and beautiful like the models that you see in magazines. While it is true that the eating disorder may have started by a comment on being too fat, not all adolescents will develop an eating disorder after they hear a comment about their weight.
What can I do?
If you feel your friend has some of the signs listed above, especially being obsessed with foods, don't panic or jump to conclusions. Talk to your friend first and find out what is going on with them. If your friend does seem to have an eating disorder, tell them that you care and worry about their condition. Help them realize the dangers and harmful effects of their behaviour. Ask them if their parents know about the problem, and if yes, how they have reacted and what they have done.
Avoid comments such “you will look better if you eat” or “you look better since you’ve gained weight”. Your friend may misinterpret it and think that they have to get fat in order to get better, but that is frightening for them and it is something they are terrified of.
Eating disorders are complex and complicated, and if your friend has one she will need your support. But you alone cannot be responsible for helping. In fact, it may take months or even years to recover, even with professional and highly specialized care. Although not impossible, it rarely disappears by itself.
Encourage your friend to see a doctor, a counsellor, a nurse or a nutritionist. A doctor can determine whether or not your friend has an eating disorder. You can also help your friend to find a teen clinic or an eating disorder clinic. You can be a great support to your friend by supporting and staying with them, but you cannot substitute or replace professional help.
However, it is possible that your friend is reluctant to listen to you or to seek help. They may not accept that they have a problem and deny that their weight is too low. They may also become less sociable and turn away from their friends. If, so, talk to a trusted adult who can help your friend. It could be a counsellor, the school nurse, or your parent.
Here are some websites and books that can help you understand what your friend is going through.
National Eating Disorder Information Centre (NEDIC)
www.nedic.ca
NEDIC is a Toronto-based, non-profit organization, established in 1985 to provide information and resources on eating disorders and weight preoccupation.
Aliveness Experience
www.aliveness.net (more for adult women – USA based)
The Aliveness Experience is a service corporation dedicated to empowering women. Because many women struggle with addictions, codependent relationships and eating disorders, the Aliveness Experience often begins working at these levels.
Something Fishy – A Web site about Eating Disorders
www.somethingfishy.org
Dedicated to raising awareness... emphasizing always that Eating Disorders are NOT about food and weight; They are just the symptoms of something deeper going on, inside.
The Academy for Eating Disorders (USA based):
http://www.aedweb.org/
A multidisciplinary professional organization focused on eating disorders research and treatment.
Saint Paul’s Hospital Eating Disorders Program
An adult Eating Disorders program in British Columbia with a consumer advisory group and links to recent publications.
For help:
Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868)
http://kidshelp.sympatico.ca/
Kids Help Phone is Canada's only toll-free, national telephone counselling service for children and youth. This site offers a forum for kids: experiencing violence, either at home or in their communities; struggling with alcohol and/or drug abuse; dealing with issues related to suicide; suffering from an eating disorder. Tips for parents and others are featured.
For reading material, we recommend:
"The Body Image Trap", by Marion Crook. British Columbia: Self-Counsel Press, 1991.
This book deals with the distorted image of fat being "wrong" and thin "right" in the world today. The book analyses the role that the media, diet industry, jokes and song play in the "religion of thin".
Developed by the Canadian Association for Adolescent Health. Based in part on source material from the Canadian Health Network.